Obituary for Baerbel "Barbara" Marianne Ochs

The light that shone from inside Baerbel Marianne (Barbara) Ochs flickered out without fanfare on October 10, 2024. Her sons were by her side and made sure she was able to hear the music she loved one last time before saying farewell. 

Barbara was born in Breslau, Germany on November 8, 1939, just two months after the invasion of Poland ignited WW II.  When the madness of war began to envelope the city, Barbara's mother, Helene Anna Klose, fled with her two daughters. As a refugee, Barbara's earliest years were filled with many hardships. But her mother worked tirelessly—sometimes enduring back-breaking labor—to keep her family together, which provided Barbara the example of resilience, strength, and the power of love that became her foundation in life.

By the time she finished her schooling, the family had relocated to Frankfurt. Barbara took a job as a "script girl" with Frankfurter Fernsehen (television) in 1960. She also became fast friends with Lieselotte (Lolo) Ochs, which inevitably garnered the attention of Lolo’s older brother, Dieter. Their relationship had just started to ripen when Dieter departed for “the States” to seek his fortune. He promised he would call for her as soon as he became established. Dieter's ambition to start a career took a backseat to the draft card Uncle Sam handed him, and he found himself a guest of the U.S Army. Wisely, the army posted him right back to Germany, where Barbara had been anticipating his return. Upon his discharge, the couple married and announced themselves to friends and family as Mr. and Mrs. Hans Dieter Ochs, a union that endured for the next 56 years.

Two years after marrying, Joe and Babs, as they were known by family and friends, emigrated from Germany with their chubby toddler, Thomas, in tow and landed in Ravenna, Ohio, spurred on by Dieter's brother Karl-Heinz, who had about ten years lead time on them. By 1966, they had relocated to Cedar Rapids. At first, Barbara felt isolated living amongst strangers. She was just beginning to learn the language and had no driver's license, and Dieter traveled widely in his work. She dealt with those obstacles by locating the nearest bus stop and she and Thomas were frequent visitors to the public library. By the end of the '60s, Barbara had acclimated herself pretty well, having picked up bits and pieces of English from television.  She made friends easily in what turned out be a benevolent community. She and Dieter also welcomed a second son, Robin, as they made Cedar Rapids their permanent home. 

Barbara was dedicated to raising her children and providing a warm, loving home. She was an amazing wife and mother. She made sure to fuel her kids' curiosity and to teach them the value of respect for culture. And she never stopped being open to learning as much as she could from them in return. 

Once Robin reached school age without incident (there were some tense moments, like when he snuck away in his p.j.s, only to be discovered two blocks up the street, heading for Bever Park and toting his toy rifle on a mission to teach that roaring lion a lesson), Barbara was able to turn her attentions to fostering her own interests.  She launched a solo freelance photography business and was forever pointing her camera at any subject that intrigued her. She enrolled in classes with Madame Kouny in Fon du Lac, Wisconsin, and learned gourmet cooking. She succeeded in obtaining U.S. citizenship in 1978 and was grateful to be able to cast her first vote in the 1980 general election. 

About this time, Barbara embarked on a career as a travel agent, first with Travel & Transport and later with Carlson Wagonlit/ Destinations Unlimited. Barbara had traveled extensively to that point, so her own life experience became a valuable source of advice and guidance for many clients, both friends and strangers alike. She and Dieter took advantage of the opportunities her occupation offered and enjoyed many fabulous trips with friends or on their own (she was never without a camera or two, of course).  Barbara loved making plans with leisure travelers looking to discover new experiences and create memorable adventures, and she continued her work in a part-time role even after Dieter's retirement.    

Barbara and Dieter were fortunate enough to be able to build their own home in 1994, based upon a design Dieter sketched. Barbara delighted in hosting dinners with friends, usually featuring exceptional fare (Dieter loved her food, and for his part proved most adept handling the corkscrew and pouring wine). She deeply appreciated her friends in the "German girls kaffeeklatsch," a group that never underestimated the importance of good cake. Naturally, their home was the center of family functions at birthdays and holidays, or even just a Sunday supper. Although she at first insisted she wasn't old enough to have grandchildren, Barbara proved to be a proud, doting grandmother who unashamedly spoiled the kids. She was there whenever called upon to provide support or as backup transportation to and from school or to practices. They depended upon her for much more than just her love and attention and will miss her enormously. 

Barbara cherished all sorts of music, from Beethoven or Vivaldi to Louis Armstrong or Bix Beiderbecke to the Beatles, and joyfully joined the church choir. She also had a passion for the outdoors, whether taking a stroll across the prairie alone, hiking, or climbing—she summited Long's Peak in Rocky Mountain National Park to mark her 60th birthday. Barbara excelled at gardening, and basically never gave up on perfecting her formidable French country garden in the fashion of the Provence on her own. She was fond of reading and honored to be included in her book club. And she did her level best to keep up with current events until just last week.

Barbara leaves behind treasured memories for Thomas and Robin, for her daughter-in-law, Bethann, and for her grandchildren Jackson, Sophia, Walker, and Kellen. She is also survived by her brother-in-law, Gerhard Fuhry of Augsburg, Germany, his son Marc Fuhry and family in Aix de Provence, France; and sister-in-law, Joan Ochs of San Diego and her children, Greg and Stephanie and their families; and Bethann's family. Hopefully, she will soon find her way to reunite with those who went ahead of her, including Dieter, Lolo, Karl-Heinz, her mother, her sister, Beate, a favorite niece, Evelyn, and half a dozen beloved aunts.

Barbara loved to laugh and to celebrate happy occasions. She did not want anyone to be sad on her account. Accordingly, there will be no immediate services and a Celebration of Life will be convened instead later this fall. 

The family extend their heartfelt thanks to the caregivers at Cottage Grove Place, who treated her with such kindness, and to Madison Lambert and her colleagues at St. Croix Hospice, professionals who were there to provide comfort when medical science had no more answers to offer. Those wishing to make a memorial donation in Barbara's memory are requested to direct their gifts to the Cedar Rapids Symphony (Orchestra Iowa) or to the Cedar Rapids Public Library.